Yes, Virginia, Chinese people are smaller…and so are their shots.
Okay, no, Chinese people are not smaller. Oh sure, they can be, but I’ve seen some really big ass Chinese people before (usually from the North, where people are usually physically larger…like Germanic barbarians…I think…). But this post is about shots…alcohol shots, those beautiful little glasses full of delicious poison nectar we throw back to get our nights started or each other absolutely plastered.
But the question here is: what is “full?”
So what size is a shot anyway? Or, to be more specific, how much liquid should a shot contain? A quick search says 1 to 1.5 ounces (so says the pinnacle of knowledge that is Yahoo Answers, that is). Does everyone agree? That should bring the liquid level fairly close to the rim of the shot glass, right?
Yeah, I think so too.
So, as you can imagine, I was fairly amused upon walking into a group of young Chinese adults celebrating a birthday and toasting each other with whiskey shots…except the shot glasses were only about 1/3 to 1/2 filled. Oh sure, straight whiskey is reasonably strong (more so than the Lemon Drop or whatever one would emasculate the guys with)…but it just isn’t a shot if it isn’t filled up. It was like splashing some cologne on your tongue.
Of course, on behalf of all those who have had real shots, I had to comment.
…and everyone ignored me.
…and I just shut my yap and sat myself down.
Now, to be fair, they did seem to slam those little droplets of whiskey (however tragic they appeared in their vastly empty vessels) back at a decent clip, especially when dice games are involved and penalties are awarded about once a minute.
That said, I’d like to take the time to make a public service announcement here: Chinese people are not light-weights when it comes to drinking. Yes, society likes to think that getting flush in the face equates to being a teetotaler but that’s really not true. Furthermore, I’m not certain Chinese (or Asians in general) get red in the face more than any other race anyway so let’s just throw all of that nonsense out. Fact is, if you haven’t had some hardcore Chinese liquor (baijiu) that often comes in toxicity levels ranging from 30-60 proof on average, you don’t know shit about how much fucking hair is on the Chinese chest when it comes to drinking.
Moreover, if you think buying a plastic jug of vodka on the bottom shelf at your local supermarket is risking blindness taking a walk on the wild side, then you haven’t tried bottom shelf Chinese baijiu. I once bought a small bottle of baijiu that cost something like 12.9 RMB (US$1.75) and that shit is straight rat poison. I’m not fucking kidding. Yes, alcohol burns through paper cups or even waxed paper cups (especially cheap Chinese waxed paper cups) but this stuff burned through as we poured.
Never have I so utterly feared losing at drinking games as I did that night. It was not fun.
In what may equate to hobos with paper-bagged whiskey bottles, I see plenty of lower class Chinese people buying swigging on these little bottles of disaster as if it were nothing. Oh sure, it’s usually the rugged manly men as I’ve never seen the gals take these on but still, Western guys need to stop thinking the Asians are all a bunch of pussies when it comes to inebriating oneself because they can definitely hold their own. Hell, they have champions.
Tags: , alcohol, baijiu, birthday, drinking, drinking games, ktv, shot, shot glass, whiskey